Almost 3 years ago, I had this interaction with a prospective client. I’m not sure if I
handled it the “right way” or not. I’m not even sure I would handle it the same way today. I received the following email message.
Hi, I need your help if possible. My wife & I will be in town next weekend for our anniversary. I want to give my wife a gift she will like. I want a massage for her, performed by a young women, and all areas treated, if you know what I mean. Do you offer this? Or can you help me find what I’m looking for? Thanks.
While there are several red flags in this message, I don’t tend to be judgmental or offended easily. I was also curious if I was making this a request that was sexual in nature, or if he was asking for sexual services. This was my response:
Sir, It would be my pleasure to assist you with your problem. Did you have something specific in mind?
Reflecting on this now, I’m not sure if “my pleasure” was the best word choice. Live and learn. I think I gave him unfounded hope. He replied with the following message:
I guess what I’m asking is some type of mild sex massage? What does a full body massage consist of? I don’t mean to be so personal but do want her satisfied. Do I need to make her an appointment for late in the day on the 24th or early morning 25th? Thank you very, very, much for your e-mail back and discussing this with me!
My suspicions were confirmed. In a way I felt a little sorry for him. He seemed desperate and didn’t know how to discuss this. For all I know he may be a quadriplegic and unable to satisfy his wife. I’m still not offended here.
I decided to take this as an opportunity to educate. I took a day to come up with a response, but this was what I sent him.
I apologize for taking so long to respond to your request.
A full body massage consists of the back, neck, head, legs, arms, feet, glutes, and chest. In some situations therapeutic breast massage may be indicated. It however would never include massaging the nipples or genitals. It is illegal in Florida as well as other states for a massage to be sexual in nature.
Therapeutic massage is not sexual. As a licensed massage therapist, I am a healthcare professional and work with doctors, acupuncturists, and chiropractors. I am not a sex worker. I personally am college educated and attended a massage school with over 800 hours of training for treating a number of health related issues.
While I can appreciate your attempt to please and satisfy your wife, I am unable to help you in this situation.
I am curious how you chose my business to make this request. Was it a Google search?
I never heard back from him. I was hoping he would let me know where he found my business information, or what made him decide to contact me. My intent was for him to understand that he should not contact a licensed massage therapist for his request in the future.
How would you reply to his request?Image courtesy of imagerymajestic /FreeDigitalPhotos.net